*Disclaimer: I think I'm funny. However, if you were to ask my friends to list five traits about me, they would probably say "smart," "nice," or even "a little flaky." "Funny" would be nowhere near that list. Even so, I still think I'm funny. Please take what follows with a grain of salt, and if you can manage a chuckle or even a sad "aww she's trying" smile, it would be most appreciated.*
Many great stories have an "a-ha!" moment. It's that moment where everything changes. The hero may decide that he fell in love with the nerd at school, or the heroine decides to take that class she's been putting off. It's some sort of twist that makes the story move forward in a positive way, turning it into "happily ever after."
I think I'm at my "a-ha!" moment.
A little about me: I'm 25. I have two bachelor's degrees. I've been working at the same place since college. I'm hopelessly addicted to FML and Craiglist Missed Connections. In short - I feel like I've done nothing with my life.
What makes this feeling worse are the constant reminders of the people my age or younger who have made it. Thank you Emma Stone for being younger than me, prettier than me, and having more talent.
I'm not just talking about famous people either. I have many friends who have these fabulous careers that they love. Who knows what they're supposed to do with their lives at 25? Apparently them. I hate them for being so self-actualized, and hate the Facebook newsfeed for rubbing their self-actualization in my face.
I've come to terms with the fact that I was never a child prodigy. I played the violin, I acted in school plays, but I didn't really have talent. If you were to put my orchestra recital up on youtube, it would probably only have 168 hits - 150 of them being from my mom showing her friends and playing the recording over and over, 10 of them being my teacher watching and critiquing the performance, and 8 poor people who were redirected to my video from that video of the kid playing the piano and singing Lady Gaga.
My point is, I'm not where I want to be in life. I know you're thinking: "Big whoop homes, everyone feels this way and we don't gripe about it on the internet." Well I do. Deal with it.
I used to ask a lot of questions when I was young. One day, my mom looked at me and asked why I ask so many questions. I looked back at her and said: "Because I want to know everything." I guess that's kind of the point of this blog. I'm 25, but unfortunately am nowhere near where I want to be in life. There are so many things that I want to do but haven't. So I decided to start doing them. I'm still young-ish, I'm healthy, so why not try some new things.
Hopefully I will use this to sort of track my progress, or how I'm "living with my quarter life crisis" (in case you didn't get the message and needed me to bash you over the head with it). I'm hoping to update this at least once or twice a week. We'll see what happens.
I'm 26, and I certainly empathize.
ReplyDeleteI would love to follow you on your journey! And don't worry, you're not the only one ready for a change!
ReplyDeleteThere are days where I wonder if we ever really find "our path" in life. We can take that big gamble and embark out on new journeys and what have you, but even when we think we have found our way, have we really found it? Are we really content with what we have stumbled upon, or are we really just settling for that "best fit" and are trying to mentally justify it as the right path?
ReplyDeleteThinking about this is what keeps me up at night when I am at work. The point is that you are indeed not alone. Perhaps with the help of a few good friends, you'll be able to get by.
I am currently 36 going on 37 in 2 months and yeah what is the "path"? When we are in high school the normal question is "What do you want to be when you Grow Up?". For some people it is easy, for others it is more difficult. Sometimes it is based on skills and sometimes on the luck of the draw of life. It ends up being picking something that utilizes your full potential or something that is attainable.
ReplyDeleteThe main thing is do what makes you happy and that gives you the most joy. It is just like the retirement commercials......Do you want to start a vineyard? etc.
Good luck in your journey on whatever you decide. I know that anything you do you will be awesome at and with your energy anything can be accomplished.